Principles of Parenting
There are as many approaches to parenting as there are parents, but scientists who study parenting agree on a basic set of principles that should guide interactions with children and teens.

• What you do matters. Think about how your treat and respond to your child and what effect it will have on him.
• You cannot be too loving. It’s not possible to spoil a child with too much love; it is possible to spoil a child by giving him things in place of love.
• Be involved in your child’s life. Effective parents rearrange their priorities so they have time to be involved in their children’s lives.
• Adapt your parenting to fit your child. Parenting approaches must change and adapt to the child’s needs – for more independence, more knowledge, more competence – at different stages of growth.
• Establish and set rules. Managing your child’s behavior when he’s young helps him learn how to manage it on his own as he grows older.
• Foster your child’s independence. Youth need to learn self-control, self-direction and an ability to think and make decisions independently. Effective parenting helps them learn these important abilities.
• Be consistent. Consistency is key to your authority with your child, and it gives him a sense of stability and safety.
• Avoid harsh discipline. Children who are spanked, hit or slapped are more likely to be bullies, use aggression or fight with other children.
• Explain your rules and decisions. Youth at any age need to understand why you’ve made certain rules and decisions.
• Treat your child with respect. If you respect your child, he is more likely to respect you and other people.

From “The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting” by Laurence Steinberg, Ph.D. (2004, Simon & Schuster, New York)